Here are three things that happened at the South Side St. Paddy's day parade:
1: An ex-frat boy tried to grab me, pointed at the pocket of my (trench)coat, and said: "What have you got in your pocket? Search them for weapons! Is that a book? You got a book in there, Frodo?"
2: A (different) green-clad hooligan ran into our path in a (fairly crowded) alley and queried: "You know Ben Franklin? He's got a boat! Motherfucker drives a boat, Ben Franklin rockin' the boat!"
3: A young lady walked past us with a green "Hooray 4 Beards" shirt, complete with a sharpied-in beard drawing (without a face to go with it---just a beard).
That is all.